Manifesting a Mate

 

Everybody talks about “abundance” nowadays – a lot.  Ninety-five percent of the time, they’re talking about money.  Moolah.  Lettuce. Greenbacks.

And that’s what 95% of the courses and teachers who deal with the Law of Attraction focus on.  After all, we all need money.  Unfortunately, we often think that having money will solve the other issues that we struggle with –  even when it comes to love and relationships.

Not to be too cynical, but the companionship we can get by having a wad of money can be, um… less than substantial.  Your money could disappear tomorrow, and if your relationship is based on money, then of course it’ill vaporize as well.  Well, at least it was fun for a while.  And now you’re alone again.

So it follows that learning to attract money doesn’t necessarily mean that you know how to attract a companion.  True, they’re both forms of abundance, but they require subtly different energies and points of focus – both are subsets of a general skill.

So, although the two are different aspects of the ability to attract what you want, they also have a lot in common.

I’m not going to go into a deep, detailed discussion of the practices or mindsets involved in learning the Law of Attraction here.  You can get that from a lot of places.  What I want to do is to focus on your desire to attract what you want in a mate or companion.

Now, an extremely important basic detail of learning to “manifest” what you want is clarity.  When you’re not absolutely clear about what you want (or you change your mind every week), you gum up the works.  It’s like telling your GPS to go “west”.  Say what?  It needs an address. a destination.  And so does the Universe, when it comes to delivering on your intentions.

Obviously, in order to set a clear intention you need to know what you want.  Furthermore, for the best results you need to also know whether what you “want” is also what you need.  You may want to marry a handsome  millionaire… but suppose that leads to you  becoming lazy, vain, or dependent?  In most cases that would not be what your Higher Self had in mind for this lifetime.  Of course nothing’s that simple, because it could be that you’re learning some life lesson from that  relationship.  But lessons can be learned the hard way or the easy way, and most of us prefer the easy way… or at least the way that is less unpleasant.

So when you decide to buckle down and really clarify what you want in a relationship, you really need to  go deep and decide what variety of relationship will be best for you.  You really need to visualize, as best you can, how you actually want things to go.  What would my daily life be like?  Is that what I want?

Some people need a real, intensely-involved life-partner.  Someone to confide in, to know their deepest thoughts, fears, and hopes.  Complete intimacy.

Others want someone to be there 24/7… to work with them, spend as much time with them as possible, share the same interests and every part of their life with them.

Some need a loving companion and partner in life, but not necessarily someone who spends every moment with them.  They’re best served by each person mostly doing their own thing, both professionally and socially, and coming home at night to the comfort of their unity.

So, we see that there are many, many subtle permutations and combinations to consider.  And of course, your best fit needs to match your prospective companion’s needs.  Complicated, but it can be done.  By asking intelligent questions, observing behavior, and being patient, you can come fairly close to knowing just what kind of relationship it would be.

Of course, sometimes the “patience” part is the most important… but also the toughest to carry out.  If you allow yourself to instantly “fall in love” and are swept off your feet, that could very well lead to an ill-considered decision – the effects of which will surely last for years.  The heat of the hormonal fire often evaporates good sense.

Do your due diligence.  Become clear about exactly what kind of relationship is best for you first, and then look for exactly those qualities in your contacts with people.  It’s work, but well worth it and it could prevent years of misery with the “wrong” person.